I like that you’re opening this up for discussion, but I feel the emphasis on men’s fear is lopsided in your piece — and it takes a toll on the conclusion.

Let’s do a ridiculous thought experiment:

a) Every time a claim is made, it is false.

b) Every time a claim is made, it is true.

Which would you rather?

Here’s why I ask:

I can deal with someone making a false claim about me better than I can deal with someone I know being assaulted or harassed.

Now, let’s focus on definitions. That’s important. I typically live with the quid pro quo definition and harassing work environment definitions I learned at work for people I don’t know at work or other places — at work, I believe quid pro quo should be expanded to include any working partnership [not just boss/report] which could bias or alter the way the work dynamic. For example, I sleep with the woman in another building who works in procurement and with whom I will probably never interact — okay, but a little sketchy. I sleep with my colleague who sits three seats down and does QA for me and some other developers, not cool. [All of this hypothetical only].

For assault, it is continuing to do something when someone says no; doing something when someone cannot say no [incapacitated or a minor]; doing something of a new type with someone you know without permission first.

Just brainstorming. I don’t see why this is so complicated?

Resident of Frogpondia.

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